Healing with Horses

Sometime in the mid 1970's a wild hearted, dreamy eyed girl moved to Kentucky to be a horse trainer. This girl, much to her dismay, ended up becoming a lawyer, marrying my father, and giving birth to me; not necessarily in that order. 


Horses remained a big part of my mama's life, and when I was old enough she brought me along with her to the stables to ride. I have so many early memories of those times on the farm with mama-most of them idyllic, warm, and wonderful. Except for the time I got bucked off a horse at about age six. Mama insisted I get back back up as soon as I was finished feeling sorry for myself. I did as much, and was proud of myself for doing so.


Life happened and my parent's marriage ended. Mama ended up having two more kids from a second marriage and I became a teenager. There was no time for the two of us to be in LaLa land at the stables anymore. I know I have looked back on those times with great nostalgia but I had never been so aware of how much I missed it all until recently. 


When I saw that my program at my University was offering an Equine Assisted Psychotherapy (EAP) class I jumped all over it. For anyone that is unfamiliar with EAP, it is not therapy for horses but rather a type of experiential therapy using horses as a teacher or a tool and/ or a catalyst for healing. Sessions are conducted on a farm (or similar horse facility) and include hands-on activities with horses which help facilitate learning about oneself.


From the beginning of my class on EAP I had an emotional connection to it. But as I got further along in the class I found myself falling head over heals for this type of therapy. I started to write how amazed I was by how powerful EAP is but the truth is,  I knew instinctively all along that I was onto something special when I signed up for the class.


There are numerous reasons beyond my own personal emotional connection to horses as to why I believe EAP to be so powerful. In many cases clients see positive results and breakthroughs so much faster than in traditional talk therapy. There is no BSing the horses. They pick up on a person's energy and mirror it back to them. This seems to happen without fail and is an incredible thing to witness. Being in nature and sharing space with these magnificent creatures is cathartic in and of itself. For some, horses can be intimidating so when a client feels they have been successful in an activity with a horse it can do wonders for confidence building. 


There are so many reasons why this therapy is so amazing and research is just now beginning on this form of healing. Below I have posted the trailer for a documentary about a family who's son was diagnosed with Autism and the journey they began which led them to Mongolia and Equine Assisted Therapy. It is a beautiful, awe-inspiring journey that I feel could help many and I am honored to share.


<iframe width="560" height="349" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/cYkT_GndKtE?rel=0" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe> 

Let Go

Let go of fear. Let go of anxiety. Let go of frustration. Let go of disappointment. Let go of perceived obstacles. Let go of worry. Let go of shame. Let go of guilt. Let go of the idea that I won't/ can't/ am not good enough. Let go of crap I don't need or love. Let go of negative perceptions of who I am. Let go of family bullshit. Let go of self consciousness. Let go of doubt. Let go of feeling I have to explain myself. Let go of the need for validation and approval. Let go of tension. Let go of expectations.

I am visualizing each one of these things as a bright red balloon. I am holding the strings attached to each balloon. I am in the country on a sunny spring day. The air smells of mud and newly sprouting grass. I feel the sun on my skin as a warm breeze kisses me hello and I let go of the balloons. They softly float up into the clear blue sky. They become smaller and smaller until now there are only a few tiny dots remaining in my view... just before they completely disappear. 

Rainbow Bridge Meditation

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=szF1my0ShV4&feature=related

Let this blow your mind. More to come. xoxo

Valentine's Day

Happy Valentine's Day!

I have always enjoyed V-day ever since I was a little girl. Tomorrow is my birthday so these two days are extra enjoyable for me. This time of year I am usually at my wits end with winter. While I have learned to view winter differently the past few years, by this point I'm dying for sunshine and warm breezes. My birthday and Valentine's day are a nice distraction.

It is fascinating to me what V-day brings up for some people. It's kind of like brussel sprouts, you either love it or hate it. I understand the tendency for some to view it as a capitalistic, commercialized excuse for a holiday (what isn't these days?,) and can be a painful reminder for some who are single and wish not to be.

It's like everything else in life. You get out of it what you put into it. You have the power to make it a miserable day or an opportunity to bask in love. I don't believe you must be romantically involved with someone to partake. It is a day to celebrate loved ones and yourself. After all, the relationship you have with yourself is the most important relationship in your life. Take today to pamper yourself. This doesn't have to cost money but it can if you wish. Meditate, practice yoga, take a bubble bath, have an artist date, watch a indulgent movie, call your grandmother, your best friend, your dad, or all three. Today is the ultimate day to partake in Radical Self Love. I hope you have a magical day...it's all up to you.

xoxo-
Yelhsa

Yikes!

Much has happened in the 30+ days since I last posted. I lost a loved one in an unthinkable tragedy. What's more is that my beloved lost even more than I dare to say in said tragedy. I picked up SARK's book Glad No Matter What immediately. Books are where I turn in times of turmoil, uncertainty, fear, and almost ANY time I don't know what the f*** to do.

One thing has become crystal clear in the last month or so. It is that I am going to commit to this blogging idea. I have long been a person that trusts and follows my "gut" instincts. I went to Ecuador for 3+ months leaving everything behind including my beloved, my "child" (dog, Molly) an apartment, job, etc., simply because I just knew it was right for me at the time. (I was right.) Several years later, I invested a significant amount of $ on attending a 9 month Yoga Teacher Training program (here in my home town) based solely on the prospect that I felt it was my next step. Now I am getting the same strong messages about my next endeavor which is to commit myself to this blog. The feeling, impulse, whatever you want to call it is all too familiar. I have to do my part. That means showing up. I don't have to make any promises that it will be monumental (though I don't doubt it will in one way or the other), I just have to visit this place and spill what I am called to share. This causes me to recall something that the great Elizabeth Gilbert graced humanity with at a TED conference. I do not pretend to come close to possessing the talent that Liz does, I merely resonate with her message. http://www.ted.com/index.php/talks/elizabeth_gilbert_on_genius.html

That's all for now. MUCH more to follow. I can't wait. Or as Louise Hay would prefer me to say, I am very much looking forward to it.

All of my love,

Yelhsa

A Study in Contradiction

"Wow. It's been almost a full year since I've been here." This is my first observation upon revisiting the idea of this blog. I am in pretty much the same place emotionally as I was (almost) one year ago the last time I wrote here. Some external changes have taken place.

I am still living in my humble but adorable (to me) condo. It still needs some work. I have less money than I had last year to do much about it. Ever the optimist I still have my plans though. I still have my beloved pups Molly and Finn by my side, and my best friend and love for the past nine years, Chino.

I heard Jessica Seinfield say something the other day that made me think. She was talking about how she cherishes her friendships with women and how she always hears other women refer to their husbands as their 'best friends.' Jessica said "my husband is not my best-friend, my best-friend is my best-friend."

At first I thought, "Yeah! Exactly. More power to us women friends." I still think this way to some extent. I cherish my friendships with women, sometimes I feel I cherish them more than my women friends do. I think I'm on the sensitive side, though I may protect this fact about myself fiercely at times. Anyway...for better or worse, right or wrong, politically correct or not. My boyfriend IS my best-friend. I do have a handful of girl friends who I consider my besties and who I would do just about anything for. I hope to gain even more meaningful friendships with women as I continue on my journey. There is one friend who I have had the longest and have been through it all with. I consider Torch and a few others, my sisters. Torch however, lives across the country and she doesn't experience me in the trenches of daily life every single day. Neither do my other lovelies, as we are all engrossed with our own stories, drama, triumphs. This doesn't make me love her/them any less or value our friendship any less. It's just that, I also consider my boyfriend my best-friend, I consider myself somewhat of a feminist, and I'm okay with both.

"Only idiots fail to contradict themselves three times a day."-Friedrich Nietzsche

"Do I contradict myself? Very well then I contradict myself. (I am large, I contain multitudes.)-Walt Whitman.

More to come on ch-ch-ch-changes.

Besos,

Yelhsa

Caveat

I've heard this word "caveat" literally 5 times today. From several different media sources. Public radio, the newspaper, an internet article, magazine article, and just now on Gossip Girl. Yes, I do indulge in mindless t.v. from time to time. Anyway, I thought the universe must be sending me a message with this word today and felt it only right to acknowledge it.

So...I'm just getting home and settled after a long day of working my "real job" at the magazine, as well as my job waiting tables. It is 11:15 p.m. I am trying not to think of how dreadful I will feel when my alarm goes off in the morning to scream at me with it's jarring "Beeeeep Beeeep Beeeep" as if a 18 wheeler is backing into my bedroom and even scarier, about to crash into my actual bed. I will snooze it approximately 4 or 5 times, maybe 6, before I actually arise like a zombie, do the "thread the needle" yoga pose on each side, while still in bed and then finally as if I am walking to my death, will stumble into the bathroom to rid myself of the inevitable morning breath.

My mornings have been this pathetic for quite some time now. I hate to sound cliche' by using the term, "vicious cycle", but it is the best way my numb mind can describe my weekdays. Staying up late at night due to my evening gig waiting tables. Coming home and trying, but failing to decipher the most valuable use of my time. Will it be playing with my beloved dogs, tidying up my condo, journaling, reading all the yoga material I'm totally behind on, blogging, paying bills, working on my goals...the list goes on and on. Inevitably I stay up way longer than intended, before I finally shame myself to go to bed. Six or seven hours later the lovely "morning routine" I described above ensues.

I won't even bore you with the ins and outs of my actual work day. I know, I know, I am REALLY feeling sorry for myself. Things could most definitely be sufficiently worse. I do remind myself everyday of how lucky I am to have a job, two (jobs) actually, that between the two of them pay my bills. No there isn't much left over after that but...well that's what I'm working on. I have a condo that I feel at home in and definitely needs some work but I do have a vision for it.... somewhat.... with the help of a very talented interior designer acquaintance.

Anywhoo...I'm actually feeling pretty damn optimistic today, minus the usual exhaustion, burnout, ready- to- find- my- life's- purpose- urgency that pervades most my days. I'm feeling very confident that I'm on to something. More than just something. I'll keep you posted.

XOXO~ Ashley

p.s. Did I mention about the classes I taught at Shine Movement Studio last week? My first ever real yoga classes. So empowering!